Guilty Pleasure: "For The Love of Ray-J 2"

The truth can no longer be avoided.

The Professional (*gulp*) is officially hooked on Ray-J.

It started out as an accident. She caught his "For the Love of Ray-J" Season 1 by happenstance towards its tail end. She brushed it off as coonery, and paid it no mind. But then... For the Love of Ray-J: Season 2 came around. And it seemed like a lot of her friends were watching it, and The Professional hates to be left out of a conversation because of her own ill-will (*nosey*). So she watched. And she watched. And now... she can't stop watching.

Is it Ray-J's hilarity during the "confessionals?" Is it his amazing facial expressions and his refreshingly candid truth? Or perhaps its because he says exactly what The Professional is thinking in her head, yet he says it on national television... She's not sure what it is, but The Professional seems more than just a reluctant fan these days. She had this feeling once before about Ray-J. She did her best to brush it aside and ignore. But daggone it if the combination of his charm and his ability to jump on the right records at the exact right time don't make her heart open right up and want to give that man-child a bear hug!

So to Ray-J: The Professional love-love-loves the show. Its the exact right mix of entertainment and ridiculousity. She effing loves you (wait though--not like, wants to have your babies "loves you...") and is fine with this public proclamation of her adoration for your hustle. She effing loves wondering why the girls on the show wore that outfit, or why their hair looks like warm trash (perm and hot comb, anyone?). She watches with baited anticipation, and she sings...

"You ain't gon' tie me down...(tie me down...)"

Damn you, Ray-J.

Thank you, and carry on.

No Menu Needed...

The Professional knows that she is a creature of habit. She likes things the way she likes them, and sees no reason to deviate from the program as established. The same is true when she dines out. Though a menu may be expansive, when The Professional finds a dish she likes--she sticks with it. Faithfully. Without fail. In fact, she'll pay you $20 if you can ever catch her ordering something other than the following at these three go-to, nationwide restaurants. She suggests that you try these items out. After all, they're so delicious that her love affair with these choices cannot be shaken :-)

The Cheesecake Factory: Thank the good baby Jesus for The Cheesecake Factory. Its drink menu is so full of fun and tasty items. Its dessert selection is heavenly. And that brown bread loaf? Absolutely delightful.

• Appetizer: Avacado Eggrolls -- So daggone flavorful, delicious...and addictive!

• Entree: Spicy Cashew Chicken -- Tender chicken & crunchy cashews over a bed of fluffy white rice.

• Dessert: White Chocolate Raspberry Truffle Cheesecake -- The Professional's local Ralph's supermarket used to sell slices of this amazing & heavenly dessert in its bakery department. When they stopped, The Professional had a grade-A meltdown right there in the market. It was sad.
  

Sidebar: The Professional actually has a dinner item stand-in for those times when her sensitive tummy can't take the super spicy Cashew Chicken. In a crunch, she'll also order the Chicken Littles. As a connoisseur of chicken strips, she is a fan of this dish at the Cheesecake Factory, and applauds the yummy honey mustard sauce that accompanies.


PF Chang's: The Professional doesn't like authentic-authentic Chinese food. She likes Americanized, franchised Chinese food--and PF Chang's is among her favorite places to dine.

• Appetizer: Chicken Lettuce Wraps -- The lettuce is always so cool & crisp...and The Professional loves to have the waiter/waitress make the sauce extra spicy.

• Entree: Mongolian Beef with White Rice -- The Professional makes certain to order her dish prepared "extra crispy," meaning that the beef pieces will come out well-done and with a slight char. Perfect!

• Dessert: Cheesecake with Raspberry Sauce -- This Raspberry sauce is simply sinful! The Professional could bottle it up and drink it like Sprite...

California Pizza Kitchen: Ahh yes...The Professional has blogged before about her love-affair with this restaurant. It is her comfort food. It is her solace. She patronizes often, and is never let down by these choices...

• Appetizer: Chicken Chowder Soup -- A cup of this warm, creamy and delicious soup is the perfect way to set the mood for her all-time favorite salad-entree.

• Entree: BBQ Chopped Chicken Salad -- The Professional orders this item tossed, no avocado (why do people try to put avocado on everything?!), and with extra dressing & ranch on the side (they never use enough). This salad is enough to change the directional pull of The Professional's entire mood. This salad is the salad of all salads. It is the cat's meow. If you have some bad news to deliver to The Professional, bring this salad (prepared as noted above), and you are guaranteed a less-harsh tongue-lashing from her. You might even be forgiven of your transgressions. Yes, this salad is that serious. End of story.

• Dessert: Key Lime Pie -- Now, a good key lime pie is hard to come by. A good one in a chain restaurant is almost not possible, but The Professional gives two thumbs up to the version served at CPK. She's not mad at it at all ;-)

Sidebar: Unfortunately, The Professional was advised yesterday that CPK no longer carries the divine Chicken Chowder soup. She believes that the decision to take this off the menu (she doesn't know if its removal is chain-wide, or just at her store) is grave and ill-advised. However, she still has warm memories of this soup, and will now be forced to vehemently deny the other soup choices. Sorry guys, the chicken tortilla soup just isn't the same as the chowder :-(


What are the go-to menu items at your favorite eateries? Though The Professional is unlikely to try them (see above, she's covered), she's tickled when others are inspired enough to show their loyalty. Bon appetite!!

Just Say No: The Scion Cube

Today, as The Professional was battling the Interstate 5 South, her eyes landed upon something dreadful.

The Scion "Cube."

She's sorry, but... what?! Whose idea was this? Who approved this to go to production? And who, pray tell, paid money for this tomfoolery?!

This is simply not an attractive vehicle. The Professional ranks it right up with the other boxy-type small SUV's and hybrid eyesores that have popped up over the last few years. However, she believes that this one takes the cake. She cannot go into a vivid-enough description as to how dreadful the design is. She is positive of this, because she almost caused a collision or three whilst trying to view the horrid car from 360 degrees. C'mon guys...a wrap-around window? Huh?!

Auto Designers: You must do better!

Auto Buyers: You must, with conviction, say NO.

That is all.

Oh Hell No: The Cab Line-Up

You've seen the cab line up in your town. Perhaps its in front of Staples Center after an event lets out. Its definitely at baggage claim, waiting to get you all the way to your destination. And sometimes its at your favorite hotel in hopes of picking up an airport run. Anywhere there are mass amounts of people needing a ride, there's the cab line.

The Professional is the first one, in any city, at any time--to hop her ass in a cab. Whether its four blocks or a forty-minute drive, she patronizes Cabbies and she tips well. However, a recent experience left her fuming mad and on the verge of cursing out an unsuspecting Indian immigrant. You see, she wanted to hop the cab line, and he wasn't having it.

It was lunchtime in Downtown Los Angeles, and the cabs were lined up on Figueroa Street waiting to catch a fare. The Professional walked up on the line, as a woman in a rush. She did so from South, with the cabs lined up facing North. She was in essence, coming up from the back. She made eye contact and walked assertively forward to the closest cab to her--which was also the last cab on the line. "Beverly Hills," she told him as she motioned for him to open the door. In response, he shook his head and pointed to the front of the cab line--a lonnnnnng city block's walk ahead of him.

Did he not see her urgency? Did he not want the $50 fare? Did he not recognize her fierce 4" Jimmy Choo's?

The Professional's face immediately contorted into a "OMG-WTF" type of look (the expression was likely accompanied by some form of neck rollling as well). The Indian cabbie looked a little frightened as he vigorously pointed ahead of him, urging her towards the first car on line. With a dramatic heavy sigh and the dirtiest look she could muster, The Professional had no choice but to move to angrily the front of the line.

You see, she didn't want to walk that long-ass block to the front. She wanted the car closest to her to scoop her up & dip the eff out. His refusal to do so led The Professional to beg some questions: Is there some type of Cabbie union or brotherhood in play? Do they not understand how dreadfully inconvenient it is to have to walk to the front of the line when it stretches out for eternity? And did this Indian man just really serve her up a dose of gangster with the ill "hell naw?"

The Professional suggests that LA taxi drivers take a cue from the New York state of mind where everything goes. Reminder: Its a daggone recession people! Pick fabulous bitches up on whatever block they need you. Thank you and carryon.