The Professional Presents: Colorful Vocabulary

Yes. She knows.

The Professional is quite embarrassed that she's let her blogging wane for the past several months. Its not because she doesn't love her readers--you can be certain of that. Its simply a case of blogging while on tour being next to impossible. Too much work. Too much moving around. Too much...everything. She sincerely apologizes. She really does.

It's actually been her time on the road that served as part of the inspiration for this particular post. While traveling the country and meeting new people each day, The Professional became acutely aware that people are tickled by her manner of speak. That is, to say... that The Professional has long known that she peppers her casual (and sometimes her professional) conversation with a plethora of unique and colorful words that may not be immediately recognizable. To that, she offers the following "dictionary" of sorts. The words and their definitions found below will help to translate The Professional's mouthpiece. Pleezebelieve that you'll never meet a character like she. This she knows :-)

RIDICULOUSITY (ree-dick-yoo-LOSS-it-ee): The act of being ridiculous. "We don't have time for your baby momma's ridiculousity."

FANTASTICAL (fan-TASS-tick-al): A descriptive word, meaning 'extremely fantastic.' "Looking forward to having a fantastical time at the event tonight!"

RANDOMONIOUS (ran-dum-MOAN-ee-us): The act of being random. "Nobody asked him for a randomonious comment about rainbow shoelaces!"

SITUATIONAL (sit-choo-A-shun-ul): An situation or event that warrants discussion. "There is a bad hood-rat situational down at the nightclub."

RETARDICROUS (re-TARD-ih-criss): A descriptive word, used when something is a cross between 'retarded' and 'ridiculous. "I just had the most retardicrous conversation with an idiot!"

DAGGONE (DAG-on): A word used for emphasis. "The car behind me needs to get off my daggone tail!"

So there you have it. Use The Professional's distinct vocabulary freely & often. Just remember to give her the credit where due ;-)